windshadow

Had a talk with warren last night. A very random talk as usual. But while doing so, i remembered him.

Recalling places, things, songs even colours that remind me of you. Crazy i know.


Yet..

You know, i realised, after all that's happened, i'm always running in your windshadow.


I want to take a step back and say i've grown up, i dont want to live up to your expectations of me. I dont want you to be there to pull me up whenever i fall. Whenever i think i cant go on. I dont want you to cheer me on like what you've been doing. Being there but not there. Always ahead. Looking back at me occasionally, telling me to hurry up.

Thank you for all the time you've given me. For all the bright moments. For lifting me up on all those numerous days. Please dont think i'm ingrateful, i'm not. I just dont want to be your burden. I dont want you to be too worried about me falling back. I'll only hamper you, you know that. I'm sick of your self-denial. I'm sick of my self-denial. I dont want to stay under your wings. It's time for me to let go.

Instead of living to be what you want me to be, whatever i want to be, just let me be.

It's time we both moved on.













I'm sorry Evan. I really am.